2005-09-01 - 3:40 a.m.
One of the morbid bits of flotsam that came across our radar at work (apropos of the avian flu) is a little discussion paper with the catchy title of "Slaughter of Poultry for Disease Control Purposes". This includes notes on "Mechanisism for Causing Death" and lists a range of methods for killing poultry, including inhalation agents, injectable anaesthetics, and a range of actions grouped under "Physical Methods". Among the factors to be considered in selecting your physical methods, is, apparently, whether these methods are aesthetically pleasing or not. According the the discussion, cervical dislocation, decapitation, and maceration are "not aesthetically pleasing".
This doesn't come as a surprise, exactly, but it does leave me wondering whether there are in fact any methods of killing poultry which could be considered aesthetically pleasing. Maybe something operatic, involving chickens wearing white nightgowns and coughing their tubercular last on romantic sick-beds? Floating down rivers amongst clusters of flowers Lady of Shallott-style? Heroic battlefield combat?
This lead at lunch to a discussion of whether there was such a thing as a really humane slaughter house. As we came back into the office in full debate on this, the new receptionist looked up at us and said "you guys always come back talking about the most interesting things..."
I think she's going to fit in well.
