2006-02-05 - 10:45 p.m.
In winter, I sleep in socks, and the transition from post-bath to sock or from night-sock to day-sock is performed at frantic speed, in order to preserve precious body-heat. Plus I tend to shower more at the gym, which is a rather less drafty place than our house.
All of this led to the fact that, when I got into the bath last night, I hadn't actually looked at my feet in some time.
And? My toenails? A shock. I didn't know my toenails had the capacity to grow that long, at least not without alerting me by beginning to lacerate the toes next to them or wear holes in my shoes. I could have had them manicured with those little sailing-boat scenes or rainbows that women get painted on their fake finger-nails.
They were so freakishly long that if my house-mates hadn't already been asleep I would have got out of the bath and demanded that they cast their eyes upon my toenails (at a safe distance, that is, so as not to risk having them actually poked out by my toenails) in order to bear witness to their mutant length.
Ick.
Also ick:
I was sitting innocently having dinner with my parents at a restaurant the other week when my mother handed me a small envelope. "These are for you," she said. "they're the gold fillings from my teeth. I had to get them replaced, and I didn't think the dentist should have them, since I'm already paying him an exorbitant amount to do the replacing. So I asked him to give them back to me, which he did rather grudgingly, I thought. Anyway, I thought you could use them for something."
I hope this is not supposed to be my inheritance.
